Embracing the ADHD Hummingbird Life

Adventures in late-diagnosed ADHD

Adapted from a Facebook post from February 2024:

It may not surprise you to hear that I have a bit of a reputation for “not sticking with things.” Depending on how long you’ve known me, you might have witnessed one (or several) of my adventures—when I trained as a postpartum doula, when I wrote parenting articles for newspapers and magazines, when I had a landscaping column with my husband, when I taught baby sign language, when I was deep into writing this or that book, when I worked as a birth doula, when I cloth-diapered and made my own laundry soap, when I processed and encapsulated placentas, when I was a vegan, when I was a runner, when I was a blogger, when I was a breastfeeding counselor, when I homeschooled, when I had a podcast, when I became a notary, when I started coaching.

Maybe I knit you a scarf. Maybe I gifted you homemade apple butter, granola, or hand-stitched wheat therapy bags. Maybe I made you wool dryer balls from fleece straight off the sheep or taught you how to mix up your own natural cleaning products. Maybe I handed you a jar of body butter or lip balm I’d just whipped up, or fed you fresh veggies from my garden—at least for that one fleeting season.

The truth is, I love to learn. I love training. I love exciting new projects. I love to dabble, to explore, to immerse myself in something completely, and then, just as suddenly, to move on.

For years, I carried shame about this. I felt like something was wrong with me—like I was supposed to be different, more consistent, more singular in my focus. I wondered why I couldn’t just stick to one thing. Why my joy in something seemed to burn so hot and bright, only to flicker into something new.

Then, a few years ago, an unexpected ADHD diagnosis shifted everything. Around that same time, I came across an idea that made my whole life make sense. In an episode of Oprah’s Super Soul Saturday, Elizabeth Gilbert described two types of people: jackhammers and hummingbirds.

"Jackhammers are people like me," Gilbert says. "You put a passion in our hands and... we don’t look up, we don’t veer, and we’re just focused on that until the end of time. It’s efficient; you get a lot done. But we tend to be obsessive and fundamentalist and sometimes a little difficult."

Then, she describes hummingbirds:

"Hummingbirds spend their lives doing it very differently. They move from tree to tree, from flower to flower, from field to field, trying this, trying that,” she explains. “Two things happen: They create incredibly rich, complex lives for themselves, and they also end up cross-pollinating the world.”

While jackhammers drill down with laser focus, hummingbirds bring something just as valuable: curiosity, adaptability, a love of exploration. They carry ideas from one place to another, sparking creativity, innovation, and unexpected connections.

And that’s when I realized: I’m not broken. I’m a hummingbird.

So much good has come into my life through my hummingbird nature. I have led a rich, interesting, fulfilling, fun life!

But the absolute best thing to come from my hummingbird ways? You.

Every leap, every pivot, every passion has brought extraordinary people into my life. Whether we met in a training, at work, at church, in a class, in a homebirth support group, in a book club, in an online forum, or somewhere else along the way—I am grateful. Every twist and turn of my journey led me to you, and there is nothing in this world I value more than my family and friends. Nothing.

One of those amazing friendships—born from a doula training years ago—recently led to a beautiful moment. My friend’s child, Annika Axman, took a picture today and sent it to me, saying, “This made me think of you.” And when I saw it, something in my soul whispered, Yes.

So, to my fellow hummingbirds: You are beautiful just as you are. The world needs you—your curiosity, your boundless enthusiasm, your ability to make life richer, brighter, and more colorful.

And to those who love a hummingbird—even if we sometimes make you roll your eyes—give us a little grace. What unexpected joy or beauty might we be bringing into your life? What might happen if you embraced the possibility instead of the chaos?

To those who have supported me through every wild endeavor, every passion project, every zigzag on my path—thank you. Thank you for giving me the space to do life in my own way. Thank you for cheering me on, no matter how unconventional my journey may seem.

And please know—I will always be ready to do the same for you. ❤️